Carl’s story: Change, connection, and possibility

Carl is a tenant at De Wint Court, an Extra Care housing scheme in Lincoln. He is also a volunteer, and someone with powerful lived experience of addiction, recovery, and rebuilding his life.

After years of struggling with alcohol dependency, serious illness, and time spent in care settings, Carl transformed his life with the support of services, community, and his own determination.

Today, he uses his experiences to help others, working with organisations, contributing to panels, and sharing his story to inspire change.

His journey offers a deeply human insight into what truly makes a difference in care: being listened to, being supported as an individual, and being seen not for past challenges, but for future potential.

When we sat down for a conversation with Carl, he shared his journey from addiction to becoming a volunteer, driven by a deep desire to repay the health and care system that supported him.

He also reflected on the people who made a difference in his life, including Clare and Karen, Assistant Managers at De Wint Court. Both joined the conversation to share their perspectives.

Also part of this conversation was Mary Nel, Adult Care Lead Practitioner at Lincolnshire County Council, who highlighted the real impact of Carl sharing his story, and how it can inspire meaningful change for others.

Seeing the person, not the problem

One of the strongest themes in the conversation is the importance of looking beyond labels, behaviours or assumptions, and instead understanding the person behind them.

Carl reflected on how easy it is to judge:

“We all judge people sometimes…but there’s a reason why…why is that person giving up? Why is that person not wanting to engage?”

This insight cuts to the core of strengths-based practice. Rather than asking “what’s wrong?”, the focus shifts to “what’s happened?” and “what matters to you?”.

Mary Nel reinforced this from a professional perspective:

“We need to be non-judgemental…but again, we need to practise that so that people can see that. Because that’s the way they will open up.”

The message is clear: people engage when they feel understood, not assessed. When professionals take time to listen and connect, they unlock the potential for real change.

The power of personalised support

Carl’s journey illustrates how personalised care, tailored to the individual’s needs, circumstances, and aspirations, can be life-changing.

After experiencing severe alcohol addiction, homelessness, and a life-threatening illness, Carl moved into De Wint Court, an Extra Care housing scheme in Lincoln. What made the difference wasn’t just the accommodation, it was how support was shaped around him.

“It’s all those services together and my engagement…you get the help if you’re prepared to help yourself.”

His story highlights a crucial balance: services must adapt to individuals, but individuals must also be supported to play an active role in their own journey.

Karen reflected on how Carl’s goals shaped the support around him:

“Carl taught me his story and his goal…to see if we can help him achieve his goal.”

This is personalised care in action - not a standard pathway, but one built around what matters to the person.

Strengths-based practice: Focusing on potential

Rather than defining Carl by his past, the people around him recognised his strengths - his determination, insight, and desire to help others.

Carl spoke powerfully about change:

“That doesn’t mean to say that people can’t change…if you get people’s help and you help yourself, anyone could be where I am.”

Today, he volunteers, contributes to recruitment and funding panels, and supports others through lived experience. His journey from “being a bit of a rogue” to proudly holding an NHS ID badge is a testament to what can happen when strengths are nurtured.

Claire captured the impact of this transformation:

“You share your story so that other people don’t follow that same path…if he can do it, I can.”

A strengths-based approach doesn’t ignore challenges. It reframes them, recognising resilience, capability and growth.

Relationships matter: The human side of care

Throughout the conversation, one thing stood out: the importance of relationships.

Carl spoke with deep appreciation about the people who supported him:

“When you can trust someone that’s supporting you and see the results…Clare had a part to play in me being where I am now.”

Trust, consistency, and genuine care are not “extras” in social care; they are fundamental.

He also highlighted how rare meaningful connection can feel:

“It was more overwhelming…people just don’t do that. They don’t want to talk to you…but it does.”

This reminds us that small acts - listening, checking in, showing up - can have a profound impact.

The importance of time, patience, and partnership

Another key theme is that change doesn’t happen overnight. It requires time, patience, and collaboration.

Carl: “People have to learn that everything takes time…you’ve got to give them time. You’ve got to have patience. You’ve got to work with them.”

This challenges systems that prioritise quick outcomes over meaningful progress. Real transformation is often gradual, non-linear, and deeply personal.

Mary stressed that collaboration is essential:

“That’s how we learn. That’s how we change our policies. That’s how we change our services.”

Partnership isn’t just between services. It includes the person themselves as an equal contributor.

Community, belonging, and the right environment

Carl’s experience at De Wint Court highlights how the right environment can support recovery and wellbeing.

Karen described Extra Care housing as:

“A street under a roof…it brings community back together.”

For Carl, this environment provided not just accessibility, but connection, purpose, and opportunity. He reflected on its impact:

“It’s absolutely done everything for me.”

Importantly, the conversation also raised the need for age-appropriate and suitable housing options, particularly for younger adults in care settings. Carl’s story is already influencing strategic thinking in this area, showing how lived experience can shape better services.

Valuing lived experience

Carl’s willingness to share his story is not just brave, it’s transformative.

His insight into addiction, recovery, and services brings something that professional knowledge alone cannot:

“If you’ve never been there, nobody can give you advice…it just wrecks lives.”

This is why peer support and lived experience roles are so important. They create understanding, credibility, and hope.

Carl’s story is already shaping practice, influencing policy, and inspiring others, often in ways he may never see.

Recognising what works

A powerful observation from Carl is how often systems focus on what goes wrong, rather than what goes right:

“They never seem to get around the table when they’ve done something right.”

This is a powerful reminder. Learning from success is just as important as learning from failure.

Carl’s journey is proof that when services work together, when people are listened to, and when support is personalised, positive outcomes are possible.

Conclusion: A different way forward

Carl’s story is ultimately one of hope, but it is also a challenge.

It challenges services to move beyond one-size-fits-all approaches and towards care that is personalised, relational, and strengths-based.

It highlights the importance of listening, building trust, and recognising potential.

And it shows that with the right support, people can not only recover but thrive.

Carl's journey reminds us that care is not just about services, it is about people. And when we truly see, hear, and support those people, extraordinary change can happen.